How To Be a Better Person: 20 Ways

How does one become a better person?

1. Commit yourself to growth (Be Growth-oriented). The more you grow, the better you become. I committed myself to a lifetime of growth back in 2006 (when I discovered my purpose), and I’ve never looked back ever since.

Work on your negative traits. Are there any traits you dislike about yourself? Some traits which I didn’t like about myself in the past include being self-centered, arrogance, selfishness, critical, harshness, hardness, etc. Identify them, then work on them one at a go. It can be challenging to try to overhaul your character at one go. On the other hand, if you work on addressing 1 negative trait at a time, it’s a lot more manageable and achievable.
Identify your ideal persona. What’s your ideal self like? Picture him/her in your mind, then write down all the traits of your ideal persona. Then, start living true to your ideal self.
Find a role model. Having a role model gives us a concrete image of who we want to become. I see role models in people like Ellen Degeneres (for her genuineness and compassion towards others), Tyra Banks (for not being afraid to stand up for what she believes in, and inspiring women to do the same), Ivanka Trump (for her beauty, intellect and grace – representing the modern day woman), Oprah (for being a power mover in the world of self-help), among others. Who is/are your role model(s), and what do you like about them?
Be a role model. The best way to be a better person is to be a role model to others. How can you be an inspirational guide to others? Live by example. In being a role model, remember it’s not about making yourself into someone you’re not (see #57 on Be Individualistic). It’s about living true to your ideal self (see #3).
Be a better child to your parents. You only have 2 parents in your life, so appreciate the time you have with them. If your relationship with your parents is non-ideal, it doesn’t mean that everything ends here. I used to have a very poor relationship with my parents, until I achieved resolution recently. Read: How I Found Peace in My Relationship with My Parents
Be a better friend to your friends. I used to be disappointed at how some of my friends aren’t always there for me when I need them, then I realized that I should think about how I can be a better friend to my friends first before making such expectations of others. Likewise for you, think: How can you be a better friend to your friends? Read: How To Have More Best Friends in Life
Be a better sibling, if you have siblings. I’ve several friends who are the only-child, and they frequently talk about how they wish they had a brother or sister. If you’re lucky enough to have brother(s) and sister(s), treasure them. Spend more time with them; Show them care and concern; Look out for them if you need to.
Be a better partner, if you’re attached. If you’ve a girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband, think about how you can be a better partner to him/her. When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to make demands and expectations about what your partner should do/be, but it’s difficult to take ownership for the things we aren’t doing/being ourselves. Commit yourself to being a better partner, and release your expectations of your partner. Both of you will be happier that way.
Be a better parent, if you have children. Many parents have told me that having a child one of the most amazing things that has ever happened to them. If you have a child(ren), think about how you can be a better parent, without impeding on the child’s growth. Raising a child can be challenging especially as he/she enters adolescence years, but that’s also part of the joy of being a parent.
Be a better employee in your company (if you work for someone). Often times, I hear people complain about how their companies are not giving them enough benefits/wages/support/etc. While this may be true, think about how you can be a better employee instead. Check if there’s anything more you can do for your manager. See if there are any new projects you can take on. See how you can improve your current performance.
Be a better manager/leader (if you’re managing others). Many people leave their jobs because they’re unhappy with their managers. How well you manage your employees can dramatically affect their motivation levels and their performance. Put their needs before yours and bring the best out of them.
Be a better member of your community. What communities are you a part of? Say, interest groups? Recreational clubs? How can you be a more active part of the communities?
Be a better human to others. How can you treat the fellow humans around you better? Start treating them this way.
Be a better being in this world. How can you make the world a better place? Start doing that today.
Be Able. Equip yourself with skills. Your skills are like the tools in your toolbox. The more skills you have, the more able you become.
- Learn something new. There are always new things to learn, no matter how much you already know. The more you learn, the better you become. Read: Skills Development
- Hone your current skills. With your current skills, strengthen them. You can never be too good at a skill – there’s always room to improve. Even the best people in their fields, such as Tiger Woods (Golf), Michael Jordan (Basketball), Beethoven (Pianist) never stopped honing their craft. Read: Leveling Up
- Be Accepting of differences – be it different people, different thinking, different lifestyles, different cultures. For they add variety and color into our lives. If everyone is the same, life will be bland – monotonous, even.
- Be Adaptable / Flexible / Versatile. Have your goals and plans, but be able to change them accordingly when the situation calls for it. Rigidity is a sign of weakness, while adaptability makes you so much more powerful.
- Be Adventurous.
  - Step out of your comfort zone. Are you sticking to the same routines and hiding behind a safety net? Step out and do something you’ve never done before. It’ll broaden your mind and make you a better person.
  - Travel. Traveling broadens perspectives and widens horizons. I’m currently touring Europe and I’m gaining so many insights about different cultures that it’s amazing. The trip has definitely enriched my perspective on the world.
- Be Altruistic.
  - Always have the best intentions for others. Go for the highest good in everything you do, every decision you make, every path you take, every thought you have.
  - Volunteer (for a cause you believe in). Not everything has to be measured in money. At PEB, I spend hours every day writing the best content and giving it away for free, without asking anything back in return from the readers. With volunteer work, you may be giving your labor for free, but this is time spent in good stead. Don’t underestimate the kind of difference you can make in others’ lives with just a few hours of work.

How To Say No To Others: The Only Guide You’ll Ever Need

How To Say No: 11 Steps

It’s an ongoing process to learn to say no, and it can be easy to tough to get started. But as long as you realize the importance of saying no, you’re on your way there. For the remainder of this article, I’ll share 11 steps to say no. Whether you’re saying no to your boss, a friend, a colleague, a family member or a stranger, you’ll find the steps helpful. Remember it’s NOT about not saying no at all, but about learning how to say no. And hopefully with this guide, you’ll now know how you can start saying no in the future. Bookmark it (Ctrl+D or delicious) so you can refer to it again and again in the future.

1. Be clear of your vision

A lot of times we don’t say no because we don’t know what exactly to say no for, other than a nagging feeling that we don’t want to do this. The nagging feeling is a start. It’s a clue that there is something else we’d rather do, a different scenario we’d rather be in. Probe further then. Think about your ideal vision, your dream outcome. What is your long-term vision for yourself, independent of the current situation? If you have your way, how would you want things to be? This is what you truly want.

Many people thought it was a big loss to quit my up-and-going career in a Fortune 100 company back in 2008. But it wasn’t a loss to me at all. To me the real loss would be if I had continued on staying in a job which was not going to lead me to my dreams. I was very clear of my end vision, which was to help others grow and live their best lives, through different mediums such as my blog, training, coaching and others. I knew this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, ever.

To continue in my job would prevent my dreams from coming to live. To stay on for another 1, 3, 5 years would only put me in the same position with respect to pursuing my passion 1, 3, 5 years later – at ground zero. I didn’t want this. My purpose and passion was the most important thing to me in my life, and there was nothing I would rather do in my life than that. To spend my time doing something which wasn’t that – there was really no point. This was why it was so easy for me to make the decision, because I knew what was at stake if I continued to say yes to my current job.

Once you know what your vision is, it’ll be extremely easy to say no, because now you have a clear reason to do so. The clearer you are, the easier it will be to say no, because you know you’ll be jeopardizing this vision whenever you say yes to something that doesn’t bring you there.

2. Know the implications of saying yes

We normally say yes to the little requests streaming in because it may seem like a small deal. Just chip in and help if we can – what’s the problem? It doesn’t take much time, maybe just 10-15 minutes, or 20 minutes max. Right?

Yet, these little moments pile up over time to become big clogs. There’s a reason why top executives, despite managing large companies and businesses, can have time for themselves, their families, friends and work all the time, while some people who are always busy day-in and day-out never seem to progress in their life situations. It’s as if the latter group is busy running to stay in the same spot. That’s because the former knows the implications of not saying no.

You can keep saying yes to errands, requests, and calls for help, but you’ll never be able to live the life you want. With every small request taking up 15 minutes, a few of such requests a day will easily suck up hours. Think in terms of months and years, and think of all the years you’re letting slip through your hands. Is that how you want your life to be summarized as – the NPC rather than the hero out there living the life he/she wants?

Whenever you get a request, think twice before you say yes or no. What’s going to happen if you say yes to it? What are the long-term implications? What is there to gain? What are you going to lose if you agree? Do you really have to say yes? What limiting beliefs do you have that are making you say yes?

I believe that time is more precious than money, because while you can earn back money, you can never get back time. Once you lose your time, you lose it forever. The moment can’t be recaptured. Because of that, I really value my time – it’s my most precious commodity and I’m very conscious of how I spend it. I only engage in activities that have the most relevance to my needs, and in everything I do and take part in, I’ll give it my all. That’s what it means to live my life to the fullest – to maximize every moment that I’m in.

3. Realize that saying no is okay

Saying no is okay. We keep thinking that it’s not okay, that the other person will feel bad, that we’re being evil, that people will be angry, that we’re being rude, etc. While these stem from good intentions in us, the thing is most of these fears are self-created. If the person is open-minded, he/she will understand when you say no.

And if the person doesn’t understand and gets unhappy, I’m not sure if saying yes is a solution to the problem to begin with. After all, you can say yes once, but you can’t possibly say yes for the rest of your life just to appease one person. And how many people do you need to keep saying yes to before you finally have to say no? In such a scenario, there’s even more reason to say no so you can let the other party know exactly where you stand once and for all, vs. leading him/her on by saying yes.

There have been past situations where I was worried about saying no, because I was afraid the person would be disappointed, or that he/she would be unhappy, and bridges would be burned. And while it took me time to convey the message, nothing bad happened from saying no. Sure I felt bad in that instant where I said it, and sure the person must have felt disappointed, but it was never as bad as I thought it would be. Many times we continue to be on good terms, if not better, because now the relationship had become stronger from the experience. I also know I can be honest with this person in saying no next time too. And to think that I was worried earlier for so many things which didn’t even come to fruition!

Saying no is okay and it’s part and parcel of life. People say yes and no all the time every day in this world. You’re definitely not the only person saying no to someone else. So don’t worry about it. Being respectful in your communication is more important (see #6).

4. Use the medium you’re most comfortable with

Use the appropriate medium to communicate the message – face-to-face, instant messaging, emailing, SMS, phone call or even others. I don’t think there’s a one best medium because I’ve used different mediums before and it depends on the context and your relationship with the person. Email is great because you can write out the message, then send and not have to worry about it, until you get the reply. Face-to-face has a personal touch to it – you can get the person’s reaction instantly, address any questions and close the issue on the spot. Instant messaging lets you see answers in real time while giving you the chance to craft your messages before sending them out.

Use whatever is best for you. It should be the medium you’re most comfortable with.

5. Keeping it simple

Keep it simple – let the person know that you can’t do it, and give a short explanation why you’re saying no. Sometimes a simple “No it’s okay”, “I’m sorry it doesn’t meet my needs at the moment”, “I have other priorities and I can’t work on this at the moment” or “Perhaps next time” work just fine. There’s no need to over-explain as it’s not relevant for the party anyway, and it might lead to the other party trying to challenge your stance instead when all you want to do is to communicate a message of “No, thank you”. If there are certain things which you’re open to discuss/negotiate on, put them up for discussion here.

6. Be respectful

Many don’t say no because they feel it’s disrespectful, however it’s about how you say it rather than the act of saying no. Be respectful in your reply, value the other party’s stance and you’ll be fine.

7. Provide an alternative if you want

This is not necessary – If you like, propose an alternative. If you don’t think you’re the right person for the request, then propose someone whom you think is a better fit. If you’re not free to be engaged at the moment but you’d like to be involved, then propose an alternate timing where you are free. If there’s something you think is an issue, then point it out so you can help him/her improve. Do it if you can and if you want to, but don’t take it upon yourself to do this.

I usually do this as an act of good will, but if I can’t think of any alternatives then I don’t. Don’t take responsibility for the person’s request because then you’re just trying to overcompensate for not being able to say yes. Saying no is not a problem nor an issue (see #3).

8. Make yourself less accessible

One situation I face from running the blog is the volume of emails and requests. Most of the messages are people seeking for help and advice. And while I’d love to address as many of them as possible, it has become a problem when there are more requests than can be humanly addressed. On an average day I’ll have requests coming in from many different places, from Facebook, Twitter, Email, during/after workshops, as well as calls/smses from friends/coachees seeking advice.

I consider this a luxury problem, because it is an honor that people trust me to open their hearts, tell me their problems and ask me for advice, over the other people in their life. At the same time it’s impossible for me to help everyone. When the emails start becoming long outpours of personal life stories, deep issues and cries for help, when phone calls become extended into 2-3 hour pep talk sessions, and when people in question become reliant on me for solutions and answers, it’s apparent that there has to be an intervention, or I can’t help other people out there who need my help too. I’ll never have the time to update PEB; I’ll never have time to write long, content rich articles; I’ll never have the time to write 30DLBL and more books, conduct workshops, develop my business, earn money for my livelihood, support my family, help others, or even have a life.

My solution for this is to limit the channels to reach me. On Twitter I only follow a small group of people (and even then I regularly follow/unfollow different people), so I don’t get DMs there. I have switched to using a Facebook Page rather than a Facebook personal account, so that there’s no inbox to check. The channel I direct all enquiries to is the contact page on PEB, which has a simple list of instructions on what to do, depending on the nature of your request. For the most part, I don’t handle personal emails anymore, which has cut out a large chunk of my emails from the past.

Where people would like to have 1-1, full-on attention and coaching, they are invited to sign up for the 1-1 coaching sessions, where they can get started in about 1-2 weeks time. My 1-1 clients get the highest priority, since they are paying for the service and they’ve shown real commitment to invest in it. In my workshops, I help everyone on a group level, after which I redirect them to my 1-1 coaching and my blog if they want detailed attention and help.

All these measures have helped to reduce incoming requests considerably. There is still a lot of streamlining I can do for my communication channels today because I still get a lot of stray requests here and there, and I’ll continue to experiment moving forward.

I think if you face the situation where too many people keep asking you for help and it’s just overwhelming you, make yourself less accessible. Don’t respond immediately to every single request, because it just sends the message that you’re always around all the time for help, which may not be true. Instead take a longer time to revert (as your schedule permits), be more concise with your replies, and limit your availability. This way, others will value your time more.

9. Write everything down first

This is very helpful for me when I’m at a block on how to say no, usually when it’s a request I feel ambiguous about. Write out everything that’s on your mind, which includes what you really want to say to the person. While you’re doing this, sometimes you may uncover pent up frustrations. That’s good. Keep writing. While you may start out confused on how exactly to say no, the answer will start formulating itself mid-way through your message. Continue typing and it’ll soon be clear on what you actually want, and how to say it. Once you’re done, now review what you wrote and edit it to fit your final message.

10. Delay your response

If you’re not keen on the request, delaying your reply is a way of showing lack of interest. I usually archive my “no” mails, think over them for a couple of weeks and reply them after that. By then the other party would know that I’m not very keen, and they would not be so persistent in their responses as well.

11. No reply is also a form of reply

In 11 Tips To Effective Email Management, I mentioned not replying emails in itself is a form of answer. It’s true. Running PEB, I often get pitches from other businesses or bloggers to review products, services, events, among other things. If I try to reply to every single one of them I wouldn’t have time to do anything else. So most of the times I reply only to those that are relevant to me. As for the rest, I don’t respond, which in itself is a reply.

If a particular request isn’t important to you and you’re stretched for time, don’t worry too much about it. Life goes on for everyone. But if the person took some time to write a personal, customized message, it’ll be nice to just send a short note to say no so you don’t leave the person hanging.

NOTE

THE GOOD YOU DO TODAY MAY BE FORGETTING

TOMORROW DO GOOD ANY WAY.

How To Be The Most Confident Person In The World

Lack of Self-Confidence Cripples You

Have you ever known someone who has low self-confidence? How does this person come across to you? A person who has a lack of self-confidence has a lack of self belief, usually caused by a sense of uncertainty about one thing or another.

Here are 8 typical behaviors of people with low self-confidence:

Undervaluing what they are capable of
Taking blame even when it is not their fault
Being overly shy and reserved
Overly critical of themselves, for example neurotic perfectionists
Being hung up over negative outcomes and ‘failures’ in the past
Preoccupation with the negative outcomes and failure even though they have not manifested yet
Having a fearful and adverse attitude towards most things
Doing things to please others

People with low self-confidence tend to repel people around them. Their limiting mindsets and behaviors make them feel ‘heavy’ and a ‘drag’ to be around. If we are to refer to the Map of Consciousness, these people vibrate in consciousness levels of Pride and below – usually levels of Shame, Guilt, Apathy and Fear.

Lack of self-confidence is a crippling trait because it often limits you in your opportunities and jeopardizes your chances of success, which leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Let’s imagine you have a project you are tasked with. Say you lack self-confidence and you predict you will not be able to deliver to expectations. What do you think will happen next? This lack of self-belief is going to influence the thoughts and actions that you undertake, both on a conscious and subconscious level. When you are constantly thinking about a negative outcome, it takes your focus off what you should be doing to achieve a desirable outcome. This eventually leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because an undesirable outcome is manifested, your belief gets enforced and you continue to have low, if not lower, self-confidence.

On the flip side, what if you are a self-confident person placed in that exact same scenario? What do you think will happen? Chances are, things will pan out differently. Because you are certain of an imminent success, you do everything needed to make it happen. If you don’t have the skills, you will acquire it. If you don’t have the knowledge, you will learn it. If something completely unprecedented happens, your confidence somehow taps into your subconscious for the solution. This sets you up for success, which subsequently enforces your self-worth, leading you on to more success. Even though you may have started out from the same spot as others, just having the self-confidence will take you much further than someone who does not have it.

Thus, having self-confidence is clearly an asset to you in life. Not only does it put you at a better and more positive emotional and mental state, it also sets you up towards getting what you want. Having self-confidence enables you to fearlessly pursue your biggest dreams. It equips you to conquer your challenges, no matter how insurmountable they may seem to me. It sets you off to live your greatest life possible.

However, most people have low self-confidence because of past events in their lives which led to that state of mind. This lack of self-confidence puts them in an endless cycle where they attract results they think of, and that reinforces their state of self-belief.

How To Increase Self-Confidence

There are a series of different ways you can use to increase self-confidence. These can be classified into three main groups.

1. Conditioning

The first is via conditioning to impose the sense of self-belief. It’s an extrinsic, outside->in approach, where you adopt actions to induce self-confidence in yourself. This is the most popular method within the self-help community and also the quickest method to get results. Ever been to any self-help motivational seminars or read any self-help books on increasing confidence? Typically, they will ask you to do various things such as repeating a positive affirmative statement, pretend you are already at a certain stature, speak and act confidently, and so on.

This is a list of examples of using conditioning to increase your self-confidence:

Dressing: Dressing smartly, Looking presentable, Having a clean and kempt look
Body language: Walking confidently, Speaking confidently, Being calm and composed, Holding your head up, Having a good posture, Smiling
Mental techniques: Positive thinking, Visualization of positive outcomes/scenarios, Focusing on your strengths rather than weaknesses, Repeating positive mantras
Others: Listening to upbeat music, Exposing yourself to inspirational materials, NLP techniques, etc
2. Acquiring Symbols Of Worth

The second is working within yourself to address the gaps that are making you feel low in self-confidence. This is the more practical approach to increasing self-confidence.

As mentioned in the beginning of the article, self-confidence is often linked with the possessing of certain knowledge, skills or abilities. Many people lack self-confidence because they feel they lack a certain competency. For example, if you have low self confidence in your job, it may be because you are lacking the information and know-how to perform well. People who have a high level of competency in a certain area often develop a high self-confidence in that area as a result.

Competency in anything can always be developed via preparation, practice and experience. The key to developing competency is to engage in knowledge acquisition and repeatedly do it to the point of ad nauseam. For example, if it’s an academia subject, read up as much as you can through different sources. If it’s a sport or technique, keep training every day. If it’s giving a presentation or public speaking, continuously practise in front of different audiences to build up the skillsets. If it’s something social like talking to a stranger, just start with small goals of talking to one stranger every day, then build up from there when it gets progressive easier. Eventually, you will find yourself so competent in the area that you become naturally self-confident in it.

Besides competency, there are other symbols of worth, of which the most common are:

1) Attributes such as level of attractiveness, popularity
2) Material possessions such as the amount of wealth you own, car, property, luxury brands, and so on
3) Status symbols such as your academic qualifications, your achievements, your job title
4) Examples of Success such as winning in a game, situations where you emerge victorious.

Depending on the symbol of worth that is relevant to you, you can acquire it to increase your self-confidence. For example, you see different people who pursue different things in order to increase their sense of self-worth. Some people strive to work on becoming more attractive and popular. Some people try to acquire material possessions such as earning more money and buying material goods. Some people seek to gain status symbols and titles. Some people strive for successes in everything they do.

The problem with acquiring symbols of worth to increase self-confidence is the boost in self-confidence only lasts as long as the symbols are valid. If they were to be removed from you or lose their relevance as a symbol of worth, your self-confidence will change accordingly.

Imagine a tennis player who measures his worth based on his victories in his tennis games. He keeps practising to increase his odds of victories. Whenever he wins, his self-confidence gets a boost; however whenever he loses, his self-confidence gets a hit. This person’s self-confidence fluctates depending on the outcome of the games.

Or, imagine someone who has low self confidence working as an entry level executive. He sees his position in his career (status) as an indicator of his worth. He works very hard in his company and gets promoted to become a manager. While this boosts his confidence, his sense of worth becomes tied to his position. In the event where his title is removed from him like when he becomes laid off, he will start having low self worth again. This has partially led many to depression after being retrenched. Asides from the financial concerns, many tie their sense of worth to their material possessions as well as status symbols.

Let’s look at cases where these symbols lose their significance. Because significance of symbols is very much defined by the society and the context, they are open to be changed. Let’s look at over different time periods. Think about some of the material goods you bought in the past which made you feel good but stop having the effect after a period of time. Some things that come to mind would be fashion items like clothings and accessories, the type of car you drive. Another example would be the context. In U.S., a car is a regular commodity. However in Singapore, a car is considered a luxury possession. In different contexts, different symbols will have different levels of signfinance.

21 Tips To Wake Up Early

For some mysterious reason, waking up early is one of the hardest habits to cultivate – not just for me, but for almost anyone I know. Here are 21 tips you can use to wake up early and stay up. The ones which work best for me are

Create a compelling reason to wake up early. What is it? For personal activities? To get more work done? To get a head start in your day? Almost all attempts to wake up early fail because there isn’t a strong enough reason driving this habit change. I can personally attest to this – during the days when I want to wake up early just for the sake of it, I fail miserably. However, when there is a compelling enough reason to do so (such as for an appointment – tip #12), I am able to, no matter how sleepy I am. If you really want to wake up early, you need to first have a strong reason on why you want to do it.
Cut out the stimulants that affect your sleep schedule, namely caffeine and alcohol. These mess around with your sleep and quality of your sleep, which subsequently affects your waking time.
Make a transition. If you always wake up at 10~11am, it isn’t too realistic to expect that you will immediately wake up at 5am the next day. Start off by improving your waking time by 15~30min every day until you reach your goal.
Create a reward for accomplishing this goal. A reward creates additional motivation. (Though if you satisfy #1 and have a compelling enough reason to wake up early, a reward wouldn’t be necessary.)
Place your goal in a prominent spot: Environmental reinforcement of your goal will embed it consciously and subconsciously into your mind. If you have a notice board, you can put up your goal on the board. Other options are to stick it up on a post-it note in front of your computer or set it as your wallpaper.
Create accountability to others. Share your goal with friends/family/acquaintances. This creates accountability on your end to wake up early.
Plan a non-negotiable agenda for the next day. This agenda should start right from the point you are supposed to wake up right till your day ends. If you don’t wake up, you will mess up your schedule for the day and end up with a backlog of work at the end.
Create urgency # 1. Set up extremely important and urgent tasks as the first items of the day so you have to wake up and finish them.
Create urgency # 2. Fix an appointment with someone early in the morning. It should be with someone really important whom you cannot cancel on or there will be dire consequences. This is by far one of the most effective methods for me. However, if you have a chronic disability to wake up early, please try other methods first. You don’t want to risk ruining your reputation and your relationship with the person if you end up oversleeping. There were times when I overslept for appointments and it would be tricky to deal with the situation each time. Nowadays, I make absolute sure that this doesn’t happen at all.
Get a morning call service. Some services are: iPing and Wake Up Land. Or you can ask someone whom you know will be awake at that time to call you.
Work on the goal with someone else. If you have a friend who wants to wake up early too, this will help generate more motivation to wake up early.
Sleep earlier. Be realistic – if you target to wake up at 5am, don’t turn in at only 1am or 2am the night before expecting to be successful in waking up on time. You are more than likely going to crash in your goal. It is the times when I sleep early and have sufficient sleep when waking early becomes a significantly easier task.
Set your alarm clock (with the correct time). Probably goes without saying, but you can’t believe the times when people tell me they woke up late because they forgot to set their alarm clock or they set their alarm time wrongly! If you are trying to get into a new sleeping routine, an alarm clock is going to be essential in the first few weeks. Once you get into the hang of it, you will likely start waking up automatically at around the same time every day without it.
Set multiple alarm clocks (3-5) at the same or different times (5 minutes apart from each other). If you are a heavy sleeper, this is a tip for you.
Put your alarm clock(s) really far (but still audible) such that you need to get off your bed to reach it. Of course, don’t go back to bed after you turn it off!
Switch your alarm to your favorite music (most mobile phones today have this function). What better way to wake up to a new day than to listen to your favorite song? By the time the music finishes playing, you will be more awake and ready to get up.
Before you sleep, mentally recite the time you want to wake up. This might sound bogus, but it works for me. Initially I thought it was just me, until someone told me recently that he was able to wake up early using this method (of which he learned from his friend, who was able to wake up early using the same method too). Our subconscious works in its own mysterious ways.
Set your alarm clock 5 minutes earlier than your designated time. When it rings, put it on snooze, and spend the next 5 minutes mentally preparing yourself for the day ahead. The next time the alarm rings, get off the bed. This is another method that works for me.
Get out of the bed immediately once you hear the alarm. You all know how it feels in the morning when you wake up – the voice in your head is just coaxing you to go to sleep every morning despite your best intents to want to wake up. Instead of giving it the chance to speak, haul yourself out of your bed the second the alarm rings. While you may feel like lead for the first 5~10 minutes, the sleepiness starts wearing off beyond that. Before you know it, you will be awake and ready to start the day.
Establish it as a daily habit. Make it a daily habit. It’s much easier to maintain a daily habit than one that’s only 5 days a week. If you keep having to balance around different timing schedules on weekdays and weekends, your body clock has to constantly adjust and it makes your task much harder.
Load up a full combination of the tips above. Don’t be modest and only use 1 or 2 of the tips above. As you already know, waking up early can be a monumental task in itself. Combine as many of the tips to drive up your chances of success! Also known as the military tactic of ‘overwhelming force’ where you overinvest your resources to ensure the certainty of success.

Why I Wake Up Early (And 9 Reasons You Should Do So Too)

1. Get a head start

If you wake up at 5am, you are starting your day earlier than 99.9% of the world. This is largely a psychological feel-good factor, but it ripples from there to create a whole host of benefits (especially #2, #3). A good start is half the battle won. It will motivate you to run ahead on your tasks so you can maintain or even widen the lead.

For example, my natural modus operandi when I wake up early is “Let’s get working now!” Compared to when I wake up late, the dominant voice in my head says: “There’s plenty of time later to do this, so let’s leave this first.” This is especially apparent when it comes to the high impact tasks in my 20/80 to-do list. While I have no problem moving straight into work whether I wake up early or late, in the latter scenario I’m doing things slower, doing easier things first and leaving the hard yet important tasks to the end of the day. This subsequently causes me to stay up late, which eats into my sleeping time and affects next day’s schedule. Then the cycle would continue the next day. This goes on to create a negative habit pattern in the long-run where I would always be rushing through tasks at night, extending beyond my bedtime, and wake up feeling tired even though I had slept more than a fair share of hours.

Honestly, in the past I never thought any tangible difference could arise from waking early and waking late. As long as you get the things done in the day, that should be all that matters, shouldn’t it? However, having tried both waking early and not, I realized the mindset difference that arises from the habit change plays a huge role in the actions you adopt. When you wake up early, you are ahead of the world and preparing for the day ahead as it unfolds. This creates an attitude of anticipation/forward thinking/proactiveness/foresightedness. When you wake up late and sleep late, more often than not, you are trying to finish your tasks for the day and getting on track in your deadlines. This leads to inclinations toward procrastination (because “I can always do this later at night”)/living in the past/reactiveness/myopia. This fundamental mindset difference makes the world of the difference in the long-run.

Of course, it’s about relativity. It doesn’t mean that everyone who wakes up late is reactive toward life. What this means is the same person will likely be more proactive and forward thinking when he/she starts waking up early, compared to if he/she wakes up late. Largely psychological but true nonetheless.

2. Increased productivity

My productivity soars on days where I wake up early. It’s a benefit that comes from getting a head start (see Reason #1). The head start creates a motivation to continue your lead ahead, resulting in (a) more things getting completed (b) things getting completed faster. This applies even if I’m awake for the same number of hours during days I wake up early and days I don’t. If I were to wake up late, I typically spend more time getting the same stuff done. This becomes a lot more apparent when you have your to-do lists laid out for the day. It’s something you have to try to experience for yourself to know what I’m talking about.

In addition, the morning creates the perfect environment to work due to the peace and quiet (see reason #5).

3. Timeliness

Ever woken up late before and have to make a mad rush out of the house for your appointments? Being on time is important to create a good impression and as a form of respect to the other party. In cases like work, being timely is essential. Rather than rush around every morning which can be a tiring activity, waking up early gives you more time to prepare and lets you be timely.

Putting a cap on your sleeping and waking time also gives structure to your days and makes you more sensitive of the how you spend your time. This goes a long way in improving your timeliness.

4. Self mastery

Waking up early is about self-mastery. As I mentioned above, there were many reasons which would thwart my waking early plans in the past. Reasons such as working late, being out late, delaying my exercise routine till late at night, being on the phone… these reasons were a function of the lack of mastery I was having over myself. If I wanted to wake up early, I had to learn to take a hold over those activities, which would mean being more organized and disciplined.

Let’s take working late as an example. If you often work late, have you ever wondered why that keeps happening? On first sight you might think it’s because you had too much work in the day or there were a lot of firefighting activities which prevented you from getting your work done. If you look into it, it’s because you are unable to manage your activities. Rather than being a master of your activities, you are letting your activities run over you. Looking into it one level deeper, the reason why you let your activities run over you is because you lack self-mastery. Being disciplined, organized, on top of your tasks, having clear stewardship – these are all elements of strong self-mastery.

5. Peace and quiet

The morning tranquility is indescribable. This tranquility comes about on two levels. First, there’s the physical quietness. You are alone with no disturbances. No one’s out on the streets, no traffic on the roads and the birds have not even broken into song yet! No smses or phone calls either to take away your attention.

Then there’s quietness on the mental level. Ever walked into an exam hall or an interview waiting room, where you can immediately feel the tension? Even though no one is speaking, you can feel the tension from the energy vibes around you. The same principle applies here. In the early hours of the morning when everyone is still at rest, you are free from the chatter in their minds. Not only that, because sleeping processes mental clutter, the chatter in your own mind is also lesser when you wake up. While physical peace is something you get by sleeping late, the mental peace only comes from waking up early.

The tranquility on both levels gives you the free space to get a fast start on whatever you want to do.

6. Faster commute

If you have to travel to work/school, you can now travel during non-peak hours and skip the traffic jams. This cuts down on the time spent in commuting.

7. Breakfast

It’s common for people to skip breakfast because they woke up late and didn’t have time. However as they say, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Having spent some 5-8 hours without eating, it’s important to have your breakfast. One of my friends used this interesting analogy to describe the importance of breakfast – “Eating breakfast is like starting your engine. If you don’t have breakfast, your engine has not started.”. When I wake up early, I get time to prepare my breakfast (fruit salads, fruit and veggie smoothies, bread with peanut butter and the like) and enjoy it too.

8. Exercise

Do you defer your exercise to the end of the day? Does your exercise plan get carried through or does it get rescheduled at times due to last minute changes? Waking up early gives you time to exercise in the morning, giving lesser chance for it to be shifted out. There’s nothing like a great workout to boost your day, too.

9. Seeing the world wake up

I totally enjoy my morning jogs where I literally see the whole city wake up before me. I start off with at 6ish in the morning, where the sky is dark, there’s minimal people on the streets and few cars on the road. As I jog through the morning (I usually jog anywhere between 6 to 11km which lasts about 1-2 hours), I witness the whole place coming alive. The human traffic increases and the traffic becomes heavier, steadily. The sky starts to lit up in different shades – first dark blue, then in gradients of purple, red, orange, yellow, and finally sunshine starts enveloping the whole place. It’s a very beautiful experience. It’s an amazing experience being an observer to the whole scene.

WELOCOME TO THE SITE OF NANA KWAME